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The beauty of the parts of us we hate
Over the many years I’ve had many clients tell me about parts of themselves that they can’t stand. “I’m too sensitive,” I hear from one client. “I hate the way I people please,” from another. “My need for control is getting in the way of my delegating,” from a third....
The value of a closed mouth
“Never miss a good chance to shut up.” ~Will Rogers The other day I walked away from a conversation with a refrain echoing in my head. It used to be more common for me, but I’ve been working on it – hard. Unfortunately yesterday I slipped into old behavior, and I was...
5 simple steps to lead more effectively
If only it were that easy to lead, that we could break it down into five simple steps. The world is much more complex. People are complicated; situations are multi-layered; and options abound. If only it were that simple. In some ways it is. The world is complex and...
The hardest work of leadership
"Contrary to the opinion of many, leaders are not born. Leaders are made, and they are made by effort and hard work." ~Vince Lombardi "She's a born leader," people say. According to Vince Lombardi, leaders are not born; they are made. I have to agree. I have to agree...
It’s one of the hardest things to say but the best leaders say it
I see it with my clients. I see it with my colleagues. I see it in myself. It's damn hard to admit when we don't know something. Somewhere along the line, we came to believe that being a leader meant being sure. Knowing the answers. Having the best and rightest...
We are our choices
“Difficulty is inevitable. Drama is a choice.” ~Anita Renfroe We are defined by our choices, big and little. On a daily basis we choose – whether (or how) to react to a coworker; if we’ll fulfill our promises and obligations; to exercise or sit on the couch; to smile...
How to handle in-fighting on your team
When I resigned my job as a general manager, the hardest part was leaving a great team of people who exceeded their goals and worked well together. But it was not always that way. When I took on the role, I quickly learned that the managers who reported to me were far...
What you should do with that anger
"The wound is the place where the Light enters you." ~Rumi Yesterday my client shared with me their anger. They also shared how they’d come to accept that they were angry, but they didn’t like that about themselves. Anger can be a tough feeling, and it’s certainly one...
Speak up – people want to hear what you have to say
In my coaching practice, I have worked with many clients who hear feedback from their boss, peers, and even their staff that they need to speak up more often. Almost always, these are leaders who are highly regarded and considered smart and technically proficient in...
Nothing is more important than breathing, and here’s why
"Breathing in, I calm my body. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is a wonderful moment." ~Thich Nhat Hanh A client came to his session the other day clearly upset about an interaction with his boss. The truth is, my client had said...
Why pausing is such an important leadership skill, and how to do it
As an Executive Coach, I get to work with many powerful, successful leaders, and many of them have a habit that's getting in their way. They're reacting too quickly, and not reacting Thoughtfully. Their colleagues will say: "I ask him a question, and his immediate...
Finding the path that seems unfindable
"Over every mountain there is a path, although it may not be seen from the valley." ~Theodore Roethke I was talking with a client the other day, and they felt stuck. Stuck in old reactions. Stuck in a situation. Stuck not knowing what to do. They were involved in a...















