“Happiness is loving what you have and letting go of what you don’t have.”
My clients often come to their coaching session wanting to work through a tough situation with a colleague (or loved one). They explain what’s gone wrong or how misheard they feel, and I generally ask them, “Would you rather be right or happy?” I ask myself the same question when I’m stuck on a sticky situation with someone I work with or love.
Sometimes, more often than I used to, I’m proud to say, I choose happy. And I have to admit that more of my clients are more often choosing happy as well.
And a key source of my happiness, I learn more and more and more, is my ability to appreciate what I DO have and lessen my grip on and need for what I don’t.
Again, I share this thought and learning with clients as well.
Yes, our brains have evolved to be Velcro for the “bad stuff” and Teflon for the “good.” We harp on what we want that we don’t have, what went wrong in the process, and how much further along we need and want to be. But when we can increase the stickiness for the “good stuff” – when we can notice what we have and love what we have – we’re happier.
Whether it’s involvement in the new project or leadership of the new team. Whether it’s recognition for the great work you’ve done or a positive callout from your boss. Whether it’s a personal goal or movement in a relationship or anything else you’ve been wanting for a while. There may be multiple things in our life that is “good stuff” that we can notice, and we are happy when we make this concerted effort to notice the things we do have and to love the things we do have.
I’m not meaning that we shouldn’t have goals and desires to aim for. Our goals and desires are often a large part of why we get up in the morning and why and how we show up every day at work. But when we base our happiness only on achieving those goals and obtaining those desires, we put a damper on our happiness.
Let us choose more often to be happy rather than right, and let us choose more often to notice and love what we have and Velcro-stick that in our brains.
How do you choose to be happy? What do you have that you love?
Please leave a comment.
If you enjoyed this post, you can read more like it in our book, The Power of Thoughtful Leadership: 101 Minutes To Being the Leader You Want To Be, available on Amazon.
For support in choosing happy, contact Robyn at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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