“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
~Oscar Wilde

Warning – this post may seem too touchy-feely…and it’s really important!

Truly loving myself is something I’ve been working on for a long time. And I’m still at it. Every time I think I have it licked, every time I’m certain that my self-love quotient has grown, every time I know and own the power of holding myself as valuable, I hit a rock in my path, or come upon a flaw in my character, or simply find myself at a weak moment, and I forget how to treat myself with compassion and respect.

And it’s not just me. I see this tendency in many of my clients, my colleagues, my friends, and my family. For some reason we are often willing to treat ourselves worse than we’d treat anyone else. To say things to ourselves that we’d never say to someone we loved, or even someone we simply tolerated. To think things about ourselves that we’d never want voiced out loud, even though we let the nasty words echo in our minds.

There is truth in pushing ourselves hard to achieve results. There is a reason to hold ourselves to high standards (it can motivate us to hit our goals). But even these things can be done in an aura of self-appreciation or self-denigration. And appreciation seems to bring out the best.

We may treat ourselves with disrespect because of long-seated issues. We may treat ourselves with disrespect because it’s simply a habit. In some ways it doesn’t really matter why we do it. We just have to find a way to stop.

Because, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but the one person you’re always with is yourself. The one person you’ll always be with is yourself. The one relationship you’ll always have is with yourself. And the one person who can always be there for you is yourself. So In My Humble Opinion, we each have to find a way to accept ourselves, challenge ourselves to continuously grow and develop while at the same time be patient with and accommodating of ourselves, and love ourselves – warts and all, mistakes and all. Because it is, bottom line, all we have, and it is the beginning of a life long romance.

How do you practice more self-appreciation? Please leave a comment.

Stop beating yourself up and see what a little love and acceptance will do.

If you enjoyed this post, you can read more like it in our book, The Power of Thoughtful Leadership: 101 Minutes To Being the Leader You Want To Be, available on Amazon.

For support in building your life-long relationship, contact Lisa at lkohn@chatsworthconsulting.com.

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