The Thoughtful Leaders Blog
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on May 21, 2012
“Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they’re yours.” Richard Bach
The common saying, “I’m my own worst enemy” comes to mind.
So much of life seems to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. My son cries that he can’t do his homework and that it’s too hard…and the homework takes him hours longer than it usually does (and is supposed to). My friend goes on a job interview, certain that she’s under-qualified and will never get the job…and she doesn’t. My client determines that his upcoming meeting with a difficult colleague will never amount to anything…and it doesn’t.
I’m not saying that we necessarily cause these outcomes, but sometimes the coincidences seem to be too much to ignore. Sometimes it really looks like our brain listens to what we say to ourselves about ourselves and others – and then brings us the result that mirrors our own belief. That when we argue for our limitations, they seem to be what we get.
If we walked into situations knowing how well we were prepared and how much we could accomplish, would that help us be more successful? I’m not certain it would, but I am certain it couldn’t hurt. I find that I can accomplish more when I have confidence and excitement working for me. When my clients prepare for upcoming situations and conversations, and then acknowledge their preparation and readiness, they seem to fly through tough circumstances with at least more flying colors. When my son knows that he can handle his homework, and even excel at it, it takes him much less time and is usually spot-on right.
When we argue for our strengths, perhaps sure enough, they’re ours as well. In a recent blog post, Tell other people what you want them to think about you, we delved further into this topic and challenged readers to be their own best advocate.
Where are you arguing for your limitations? Where can you argue for your strengths?
Acknowledge what you may need to do to better prepare or perfect your skills, and then argue for your strengths.
To see how coaching can help you argue for your strengths, contact Lisa at lkohn@chatsworthconsulting.com.
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Robyn McLeod on May 17, 2012
As a firm believer in the presence of leadership at all levels in an organization, I particularly enjoyed a recent Harvard Business Review post, Find the Reverse Leaders in your Midst, by Scott Edinger. Edinger describes it as reverse leadership – “when someone not in a formal leadership role demonstrates great leadership ability.”
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on May 15, 2012
We have written about the impact of technology on our lives and work numerous times, sharing our perspectives on how our constant need to email, text, tweet, and update status disconnects us from good old-fashioned face-to-face human interaction. We’ve shared our experiences about being bowled over by a fast-walking texter in Manhattan, observing a group of people around a table focused on their electronic devices rather than each other, coaching an executive about the perils of replying to emails during happy hour (or while driving), empathizing with the employee who spends most meetings with her boss wondering if he has heard a word she has said as he “multitasks” in her presence.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on May 14, 2012
“Invention, my dear friends, is 93 percent perspiration, 6 percent electricity, 4 percent evaporation, and 2 percent butterscotch ripple.” Gene Wilder as Willie Wonka
New ideas are born from sweat…and a bit of magic.
So often we think that creativity and true invention should come to us easily, with no effort at all – like the proverbial light bulb over the head. Or we believe that it requires tons of effort and hard work. I’ve found the truth to be actually neither of those; it’s something else entirely. My best ideas seem to come when I put in enough effort to work up a sweat – and when I count on a bit of magic and/or grace to pull me through.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Lisa Kohn on May 10, 2012
 I am feeling it – that feeling of just too much. Too much to do. Too many deadlines. Too many balls in there air. And while I coach clients and offer keynote sessions on managing overwhelm, I’m feeling too caught in my own stuff to know what I know…so here’s a refresher for me (and perhaps for you). And yes, I did pick up The Power of Thoughtful Leadership to help me remember:
Let the little things slide – Right now, at my house, the bed is unmade, the laundry is unfolded, and there are dishes in the sink. Right now, in my office, there’s a pile of magazines that need to be looked through, a pile of papers that need to be filed, and a pile of expenses that need to be entered. Right now, on my to-do list, are many documents to be edited and a full email inbox to go through…and none of that really matters. These are the little things that I normally do to keep my life calmer and more clutter-free, but there simply isn’t time right now and I have to let them slide. And forgive myself for not keeping up with my own standards.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on May 7, 2012
“I decided to start anew, to strip away what I had been taught.” Georgia O’Keefe
I have found – in my own life and work as well as in the lives and work of my clients, colleagues, and friends – that so often it is what I “know” that gets in the way of what I have to learn.
I may “know” how to approach a task or a person, and I may be completely wrong. But my “knowing” stops me from being open to possibilities and new ways that may work better. I may “know” the cause of a problem or situation, and again, my “knowing” closes my mind to new truths and other ideas. I may “know” the best way to write or paint or connect with others, and again, my “knowing” may limit my abilities. What I’ve been taught, what I’ve “known” all along, may get in my way over and over again.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Robyn McLeod on May 3, 2012
 This past weekend I ran a 5K race through the Bronx Zoo – the Run for the Wild to raise funds to save the world’s lion population. It was a great run traversing up, down, and through the many trails of the zoo. On a cool morning, many of the animals were out. We saw giraffes, sea lions, African wild dogs, peacocks, and other animals.
There were runners of all abilities and stripes – thousands of us. As my husband and I ran together, it was great to see so many groups of co-workers running together, having fun, getting exercise, and raising money for a great cause. What a great formula for employee morale and engagement!
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on April 30, 2012
“Of course that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong.” Dennis Miller
I am convinced that there would be less conflict in life – even in the world – if more of us were willing and able to admit that we might be wrong. Whenever I get most stuck with colleagues, clients, or family members, it is invariably because both parties (noticeably myself included) are convinced that they are right. That their opinion is “Truth,” and that this Truth is the only real and valid truth.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Lisa Kohn on April 26, 2012
 To grow as a leader, or in any endeavor, it is essential to build upon your strengths. And in order to do that, you must be aware of your strengths – the specific things that make you you, that make you great, and that make you good at what you do. This awareness is something many of us have trouble identifying and embracing.
A great way to find your strengths is to do some research. To spend time in reflection; to look around you and notice what you love, what you excel at, where you truly shine. Your research should include asking others – to reach out to those people who know you really well and ask them to notice and to list the best things that make you you. Noticing the strengths in others, and contemplating which of those you might also possess, is another way to find your strengths.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Posted by Chatsworth Consulting Group on April 23, 2012
“There is no limit to what can be accomplished if it doesn’t matter who gets the credit.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
One of the ways we start many of our client engagements is with an OEA – our Organizational Effectiveness Assessment. This allows us to gather anonymous input from our clients’ employees as to what’s working at the organization, and what isn’t.
One of the workplace issues that often arise is the taking of credit and the placement of blame. It seems that way too many managers and leaders, at least in eyes of those that report to them, are too eager to take credit and too willing to place blame.
(Continue reading…)
Related Posts:
Leave a Reply
Older Posts »
|
|
View Robyn McLeod's profile
by delegating and building the team,
hey if they don’t want to play, I will find someone else interested in doing a good job
Delegating is a great way to stop overwhelm and build your team. Thanks for sharing Tim!
Well, we all have been overwhelmed with the task we need to do. But I focus on small things that can be solve easily and keep that momentum. You will never notice that you already finish your without even bothering to check on it.
Thanks Melisa. I also find it helpful to make myself notice the things I do accomplish, as that helps me feel less in overwhelm and I’m likely not to notice them if I don’t actively try to.