|
||
The Thoughtful Leaders™ BlogAre you truly listening?
The other day I was ‘listening‘ to my colleague. We were in the midst of a heated discussion, and it was her turn to share. I knew how to listen – I teach listening skills after all. I kept my mouth shut and allowed her to speak her piece…biding my time until I could jump in with my retort or, in my mind at least, my incredibly stronger argument. Related Posts:Leave a Reply5 things your coach won’t tell you (and a few things they will…or should)
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyUnlearning is a leadership skill
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyHow NOT to receive feedback
Sam, on the other hand, arrived like a bull in a china shop – questioning everything, micromanaging, withholding information, and treating people poorly. In one year he wreaked havoc on morale and created bottlenecks to progress that had been made within the organization. Related Posts:2 Responses to “How NOT to receive feedback”Leave a ReplySharing a great op-ed about technology vs. conversation
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyLesson learned: Focus on your customer
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyCan you truly hear?
Usually when I think about this quote, I envision myself in front of a classroom, emphasizing the importance of listening and truly hearing in building effective relationships. These are both important; that is an undeniable truth. Related Posts:Leave a ReplyDo you need someone to break your glass?
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyListen
I have a client whom I challenge to listen more fully to people – even people, and especially people, in whom he has no interest. “Go ahead,” I urge, “See what you can learn from them, especially since you expect to learn nothing.” Related Posts:Leave a ReplyHow to be a coach at work Related Posts:Leave a Reply |
|
|
______________________________________________________
about us | assessment of current systems and practices | book a speaker | change management ©2002-2013 Chatsworth Consulting Group. All rights reserved. |
|
I firmly believe in the 
Years ago in one of my first leadership roles, I was nervous about taking over a department that was new to me. I was seen as a strong manager but I knew that I had a steep learning curve ahead to understand the ins and outs of the work of the department. At the time I believed that I could not lead effectively if I did not know more about the day-to-day work than anyone else. I pored over reports, data, and manuals, attended endless meetings – and never asked questions of my team out of fear that they would see me as weak. I felt I had to know everything there was to know about our area – and that belief made the transition a lot harder than it needed to be.
We sat on pins and needles as “Sam” perused his 360° feedback report. Sam had joined our team as the general manager about a year earlier and it was a difficult year for all of us who reported to him. Our previous boss was someone who had established great rapport with everyone, invested time in building trust within the organization, and focused keenly on developing people.
We have written about the impact of technology on our lives and work numerous times, sharing our perspectives on how our constant need to email, text, tweet, and update status disconnects us from good old-fashioned face-to-face human interaction. We’ve shared our experiences about being bowled over by a fast-walking texter in Manhattan, observing a group of people around a table focused on their electronic devices rather than each other, coaching an executive about the perils of replying to emails during happy hour (or while driving), empathizing with the employee who spends most meetings with her boss wondering if he has heard a word she has said as he “multitasks” in her presence.
in the development of our business we had a big meeting with a Vice President at a major bank whom we desperately wanted as a client. We created a well-organized presentation deck, thought through all that we wanted her to know about us, and set an intention to walk away from the meeting with a proposal opportunity. As the meeting progressed, we noticed that she was not saying much and did not seem fully engaged. So in wrapping up we asked if she had any questions for us and whether there was anything that would make her hesitant to work with us. Her response made me cringe. “It was great to hear about your work,” she said. “But you spent way too much time talking about yourselves and very little time finding out about me, my work, and what I need.” It was one of those palm slap to the forehead moments.
The other day my daughter and I were discussing the challenges and rewards of working at a large corporation. As someone who is relatively early in her career, she is learning how to navigate the political landscape within her company and how to deal with the wide variety of personalities and characters she comes across in the workplace.
Last week we blogged about the benefits of hiring an executive coach and offered a tool for assessing whether you are ready for coaching. As you probably are aware, we believe strongly in the power of coaching as a tool for achieving your goals, going for what you want, and being an even better you. Who wouldn’t benefit from that?!
I have seen this movie before. Extremely destructive.
Thanks Karin. It’s all too common, unfortunately.