|
||
The Thoughtful Leaders™ BlogAre you getting honest feedback?
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyNo is a complete sentence
Related Posts:Leave a Reply3 vital Thoughtful Leadership™ skills I learned from my old friends
It makes me realize how important the people around us are. As leaders (and colleagues and parents, siblings, and friends) we get caught up in the challenges of the day, the issues that need to be solved, the office (and family) politics we have to work through, the reports that need to be written and chores that need to be done. And we forget about the people we come into contact with, even though it’s the people that make a difference in the long run. It’s the people that we’ll remember and treasure, and miss when we’re apart. Related Posts:Leave a ReplyThe real ways to capitalize on failure
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyHelp I’m in overwhelm…and 4 key steps out
Related Posts:4 Responses to “Help I’m in overwhelm…and 4 key steps out”Leave a ReplySlow it down and keep it real
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyChoose a different street. An autobiography in five chapters.
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyThoughts on failure from an innovative genius and nobel laureate
A great leader not only facilitates innovative thinking and great ideas but encourages failure as well. A great leader says “Let’s try it” rather than “That won’t work;” “Take a risk” rather than “Play it safe;” “What do you need?” rather than “What were you thinking?” He or she knows that some of the best ideas can come from small tweaks and incremental improvements rather than waiting for “the next big thing.” Related Posts:Leave a ReplyUnlearning is a leadership skill
Related Posts:Leave a ReplyGandhi’s secret
It almost feels as if there’s nothing I can add to this quote. I had to read it a few times myself for all of the weight of it to sink in. What if we were to live as if we were to die tomorrow? What would we do? What would we say? How would we spend our time and who with? I know for me that thought makes me want to stop mid-sentence and tell everyone I love that I love them. It makes me want to choose something to do in the next moment that will really add value (as hopefully this Thoughtful Leaders™ Minute will). It makes me want to live at risk and go for my dreams. It makes me thoughtful and more intentional – and aware of the beauty in the world around me and all that I can enjoy. Related Posts:Leave a Reply |
|
|
______________________________________________________
about us | assessment of current systems and practices | book a speaker | change management ©2002-2013 Chatsworth Consulting Group. All rights reserved. |
|
It’s said that the only way to truly grow as a leader is to have access to candid feedback about what you are doing well in leadership and where you need to improve. There are certainly processes that have been established in many organizations to get some of that – annual performance evaluations, 360° feedback, employee opinion surveys, executive coaching – but what steps can you take on your own to ensure that you are getting honest feedback?
Why is “no” such a difficult thing to say? We’re great at it when we’re two. “No” seems to be our favorite word at that age (at least it was for my kids). But somewhere along the line we forget that ability; we forget the word. Someone asks us to do something that we long to say “no” to, and yet, perhaps out of guilt or fear or shame, or perhaps out of more positive motivations like compassion and caring, we find ourselves saying “yes.” Agreeing to what we knew we didn’t want to do. So many of us forget how to say “no,” or think we can’t, or know we shouldn’t, or know we 
I’ve spent the last week catching up with old friends. Friends from high school, college, and my job in advertising too many years ago. So I’ve spent a great deal of time thinking about how lucky I am to have had, and have now, these people in my life – even the ones I don’t talk with often enough.
We have written about the benefits of not being 
I have spoiled people’s problems and I know it. At home I’m renovating a kitchen (with roughly 10 decisions to make every day), planning a vacation, shopping for my daughter’s senior prom dress, and making it to as many of my son’s basketball games as possible. At work I’m juggling four significant leadership programs, a large handful of coaching clients, and potential new business with recurring clients and new ones. My assistant sent me an email listing the twenty-plus people I have to schedule meetings or calls with in March, in my already too-tight schedule. All this while trying to practice Thoughtful Leadership™ and maintain my self-care. And writing a blog post. Again, I know these are “spoiled” people’s problems and I’m not complaining, but 
A recent blog post on the HBR Daily Alert caught my eye, the title of which was “
Someone recently reminded me of this clever five-chapter poem about 
The thing that most often gets in the way of brilliant ideas is the desire not to be wrong. When we second-guess ourselves, convince ourselves of the error in our thinking, tell ourselves that our idea will fail, or listen to others who poo-poo our bursts of brilliance, innovation and growth suffers.
Years ago in one of my first leadership roles, I was nervous about taking over a department that was new to me. I was seen as a strong manager but I knew that I had a steep learning curve ahead to understand the ins and outs of the work of the department. At the time I believed that I could not lead effectively if I did not know more about the day-to-day work than anyone else. I pored over reports, data, and manuals, attended endless meetings – and never asked questions of my team out of fear that they would see me as weak. I felt I had to know everything there was to know about our area – and that belief made the transition a lot harder than it needed to be.
Thanks for sharing this, Lisa. I feel like I can totally relate and it simply makes me feel more connected knowing that other women and/or moms have similar challenges. I really try to talk to myself in a voice and tone that I’d talk to a friend or my sister in, saying things like, “Breathe, it’s all going to be ok, you are not a machine but a human…” Might seem silly and I hope no one hears me, but it works!!
Thanks for all you do.
Marjorie
Thanks for your comments and thoughts Marjorie. It sounds like you’ve found a great way to take care of yourself and get through. I’ve often suggested that we should treat ourselves like we’d treat someone we love (unfortunately not always ourselves). I do believe we’re all in this together. Yesterday, while editing essays for my daughter at 8pm, I found myself literally falling asleep as I read. So I headed for the couch, took a power nap, and woke up in time to put my son to bed and edit further with my daughter. Whatever we have to do I say! Thanks again.
I try to delegate as much as I can to my staff. Sometimes I find that I hold on to things because I think I am the only person that can do them, but then I realize that I have a staff that are very capable. It is difficult to let go, but I find that it too helps me with my own overwhelm.
Thanks Cheryl. It can be very difficult to let go – thanks for reminding us that it’s necessary and smart to do so!